Pondering humility

An interesting thought I received this AM from a fellow named Christopher Dew who gathers powerful info to send to his email friends each morning christopher-dew.com


It is high time that the idea of success
be replaced by the idea of service.
Albert Einstein

HUMILITY AS STEP 7 LOOMS: WHEN I LOOK DEEP INSIDE OF ME I MUST BE HONEST AND SAY THAT HUMILITY THE WAY I SEE IT ROBS ME OF WORLDLY LUSTS AND DESIRES. LET ME TELL YOU WHY-WHEN I TAKE A DESIRE TO MY GOD (WHO I BELIEVE IS ALL-SEEING ALL-POWERFUL AND IN CHARGE IN ABSOLUTELY EVERY WAY IMAGINABLE), BEFORE I CAN EVEN PRESENT IT IN THOUGHT TO MY LORD I CAN SEE THE CLARITY OF ITS MOTIVATION EITHER SELFISH OR SERVICE RELATED (GODLY)

TAKING THE 12 STEPS TO FREEDOM GIVES ME INNER JOY WITHOUT TANGIBLE PHYSICAL RESULTS AS IT BUILD MY RELATIONSHIP TO GOD

GET CONNECTED AND LEARN HOW YOU CAN GET GET SPIRITUAL ANSWERS TODAY WITH TWO-WAY PRAYER SEE
www.SharingTheBurden.ca UNDER NAVIGATION OR GET IN TOUCH

Other 6th Step Thoughts

An excellent spiritual assist for 12 step work (Scott's opinion) is the book entitled "Serenity A Companion For 12 Step Recovery" http://www.amazon.com/Serenity-Companion-Twelve-Step-Recovery/dp/0840715420

Authors Dr Robert Hemfelt http://unjobs.org/authors/robert-hemfelt and Dr Richard Fowler do a powerful job of demonstrating the 12 step work based on the biblical principles that provided the original foundation for AA's 12 step program.

This sentence at the end of the 6th step reading jumped out at me this month: "We will not be healed and sent forward immediately; rather, recovery will be a daily effort to evaluate , balance and adjust the healthy expression of all of our God-given needs" This simply says to me that this whole 12 step thing is a good way to live life and, living life is a full time job that cannot skip a day and stay intact!

http://sharingtheburden.blogspot.com/
http://twitter.com/sharingburden
www.SharingTheBurden.ca

.........7 is coming "humbly asked the Power/God to remove our shortcomings"

6th month thoughts

Reflection of Step 6 work for June 09

75 % success rate for the original 12 steps www.aabacktobasics.com Seems to me that taking the step the way it worked so well in the past is still a good way to do it!

Spiritual work requires spiritual relationship to both God and other spiritual workers. Two way prayer done with a partner is far more successful than prayer done without one (Scott's experience anyway). The human accountability factor comes in here for me. I need to be challenged and when I embark in partnership in any spiritual area, I am far more likely to see it through than if I do it on my own.

Acceptance is Freedom: wherever I am at the end of the 6th step work is OK, with or without my problems having been removed. I trust that Gos will do exactly what needs to be done in my life and that whatever I am left with at the end of it is what I need for the rest of the journey. Because I am not alone in my Spiritual quest, I do not have to blame myself for its outcome. IT IS RIGHT!!

ESTEEM or ADDICTION, is it possible to have both (I mean healthy self-esteem)? If I am not satisfied with my life, what am I clinging to or grasping for that I feel will relieve the dissatisfaction. Whatever it is (material, lifestyle, financial security, love, sex, relationship, substance, power, prestige etc), am I READY (step 6) to accept life with or without it and have I prayed for this READINESS (step 6). Is there anything along these lines that could be construed as a defect or flaw; anything that is being IDOLIZED? Would I feel better about me (less shame-more esteem) if I was not hungering for these things?? Go easy Scott, Rome was not built in a day!!!

Thorns can work there way out. I do not have to give up hope because I must retain one or more(thorn(s)/flaws) for this moment in time. I must once again remember, there is but this moment and my only job is to live it to its fullest disregarding the previous and the next moments.
Yesterday... Today... and Tomorrow
There are two days in every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.
One of these days is Yesterday with its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back Yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed; we cannot erase a single word said. Yesterday is gone.
The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow with its possible adversities, its burdens, its large promise and poor performance. Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds - but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in Tomorrow, for it is yet unborn.
This leaves only one day - Today. Any man can fight the battles of just one day; it is only when you or I add the burdens of those two awful eternities - Yesterday - and Tomorrow - that we break down.
It is not the experience of Today that drives men mad - it is the remorse or bitterness for something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.
Let us, therefore, live but One Day at a Time.

Step 7 SPELLS HUMILITY.......................! Get ready to humble!

scott@SharingTheBurden.ca
http://sharingtheburden.blogspot.com/
http://twitter.com/sharingburden
www.SharingTheBurden.ca

Taking Step 6

Back To Basics ISBN 0-9657720-1-2 written by Wally P is a format of bringing people through the 12 steps as Dr Bob (co-founder of AA) did in the beginning when alcoholics recovered at a 75% success rate during the 1940's. Nothing has come anywhere close since that time! I am 100% behind this program and believe it can benefit anyone on this planet who believes he/she IS NOT PERFECT. The following is an excerpt from this publication and I use it to demonstrate how one might go about actually taking step 6 as opposed to discussing or reading about it. I will refer to this book most months as a guideline to taking the corresponding step (e.g. sixth step in the sixth month-June):

I had some tech problems with duplicating what I wanted to demonstrate as you can see from the unreadable scan at left. Hopefully the following will help you take the step:

"...Are we now ready to let the Power/God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all-every one? (If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask the Power/God to help us be willing)" ANSWER YES OR NO TO THIS QUESTION! those of you who answered yes to this question have completed Step 6 and are ready to go onto step 7. CONGRATULATIONS! See www.AABackToBasics.com

More info from Wally P about AA's specific working of Step6 http://www.aabacktobasics.org/Recovery%20Today%20Articles/Article%206-Final-Recovery%20Today%205-15-08.doc

Trillium Conference

This is big weekend for families and friends of problem drinkers.

Trillium Conference Program near airport Toronto
http://al-anon.alateen.on.ca/trillium/program.pdf

Wanna know how your life might be affected and what to do about it?

Come on down and check it out http://al-anon.alateen.on.ca/trillium/index.shtml
Need some support to make it happen, get hold of me Scott@SharingTheBurden.ca

No idea what I am talking about check out www.SharingTheBurden.ca and http://sharingtheburden.blogspot.com/ and find some answers to:
-12 steps to freedom
-2-way prayer
-a spiritual answer to relational problems
-lives affected by other people's addictions/behaviours
-YOU ARE NOT ALONE

Need some specific help for booze related problems:
Al-Anon
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

Al-Anon Meetings
http://www.google.ca/aclk?sa=L&ai=CUK0jCdY7So-iEI-aNOLQuIcMp6O6H_-7qMwC36O33A4IABABUM7dypn4_____wFg_cCagegDyAEBqgQYT9Adc1EHzTvNYgJzF6YLPMKrrh1wCI1u&sig=AGiWqtxyaXQS1YEY2KEz9KgF0kWrT0Mq9g&q=http://www.al-anonfamilygroups.org/meetings/meeting.html

Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.aa.org

2-Way prayer (with or without partner)

This 2 way prayer works too well. I am afraid to use it when I suspect the answer is going to go against my will.

The best way to do it (I think) is with a trusted friend who is spiritual and unbiased. I pray to a living God of course as a Christian and when I have sessions with people (regardless their basis for spirituality), I naturally pray to my God. I say this not to preach my way but to attribute my personal success to the God I understand and love!

Comment if there is any interest out there on how it works! What have you to lose and who will know who you are anyway?

More to come!

Distortion of real needs

I have heard that we have the basic needs of LOVE SECURITY and ACCEPTANCE. The balance between avoidance at one of the spectrum which says "I don't need these things" to the over expression of the same needs at the other end that says "more more more and its never enough (addictive tendency)", is difficult to establish. Seems so easy for the false solutions (gods) of sex, money, power, property, lifestyle and prestige to take the place of faith in something greater than ourselves.
Again when looking at readiness for flaw/removal, have I looked at how this balance would be affected with or without certain aspects of my character and was I considerate of true balance in these basic need areas as I prepared for the taking of step 6?

Would I stay in a 12 step program if everything I found uncomfortable in life was removed? Would my hunger for the wisdom and spiritual satisfaction of life dry up if I quit?? Would a great sense of purpose cease to be a part of my existence If I did quit?
The following claims of 12 steppers have always encouraged me to keep on trucking.........




12 Claims
Various Claims of Promise from 12 Steppers
1. We will find ourselves worthy of love and able to love others. We will not lose ourselves.
2. Courage and fellowship will replace fear.
3. Our lives will yield hope to share with others.
4. We will come to know the vastness of our emotions without being in slavery to them.
5. Learning to forgive, we will no longer be bound by our secrets to live in shame.
6. Serenity and peace will have meaning for us.
7. We will allow our lives and the lives of those we love to flow day by day with spiritual ease, balance and grace.
8. Attitude and outlook will be renewed.
9. Intuition will guide us to handle situations that were impossible in the past.
10. We will not regret the past recognizing its value for other sufferers.
11. Selfish interests will fall away as we gain interest in others.
12. Faith and gratitude will replace fear as we realize that a Greater Power is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

uncovering

What do I do for me (motivation being a healthier all around Scott)?
or
What do I do for me (motivation-to be SEEN as a healthier all-around Scott)?

I wonder how different everything would be if I asked myself this before opening my mouth in any discussion. Can I say anything UNBIASED with NO INTENTION to sway, right, convince, alert, fix, condemn, point out MY WAY. Can I say anything with passion that is not a forceful attest to MY STUFF? What would conversation be like with no talk of others?

What do I really cling to? Are these things/people MINE for the clinging?

This stuff gets the juices flowing for me. Have I prayed today for the honest VIEW of myself? If I could see me through God's eyes, how would I like that?

STEP 6 READINESS WOW-NO SMALL STEP for this little part of mankind called Scott. Every step can encapsulate the clout of the entire philosophy when I can SEE (glimpse)

Share you burdens and get FREEDOM!
http://www.sharingtheburden.ca/
http://sharingtheburden.blogspot.com/

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/step-6/142353-sixth-step-prayer.html
Sixth Step Prayer
Dear God,I am ready for your help in removing from me the defects of character which I now realize are an obstacle to my recovery. Help me to continue being honest with myself and guide me toward spiritual and mental health.

Traditions for relationships

We have steps for emotional work and traditions for consistency and much more.
In solid 12 step programs we find that the traditions are the magic in relationship building. So 1-I get some emotional stability with the steps and then 2-I get the blueprint for immersing that healthier specimen (Scott) into relationship.

Tradition 6 in a fellowship I belong to says that "our groups ought never endorse finance or lend our name to any outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary SPIRITUAL AIM". What does this mean? Well to me some of the following:
-stay pure with healthy detachment, love yes but do not attach (cling)
-we talk about groups here not individuals, so I am not alone in the concept, I am supported
-spiritual aim implies that something greater than me is involved, that is comforting as so much in life is inexplicable without God or something greater to defer to. The road is impossible on my own. So God and human relationship are part and parcel of this tradition. This formula I believe can succeed-somehow!
-money, property and prestige rob me of spirituality, what will I choose for direction? When AA was starting to grow in the 30's one of its co founders sought the help of Mr. Rockefeller as he felt rapid expansion required money to be workable. Mr Rockefeller said that money was no problem however he would not do it because AA had something money could not buy and he worried that the magic may disappear if traditional investing were added to the formula. Perhaps the richest man in the world at the time saw beyond the needs and drawbacks of money matters. It was agreed that small reserves of money to cover expenses only would be the traditional way of the fellowship. Under this principle the fellowship grew from two to two million and stays there. I will therefore believe that the groups focusing on spiritual recovery will succeed and the necessary ingredients will always be there as long as we do our part. God is in charge!

We'll touch on a tradition for a bit each month as we work our way through the 12 steps

TAKE THE 12 STEPS TO FREEDOM WWW.sharingTheBurden.ca

Step6-Am I really ready?

The statement "we were entirely ready to have this power/God remove all these defects of character"
-which ones?
-when will I know?
-what is yet to be uncovered?
HOW DO I PREPARE?

Well, I can only use me as an example and my "thorn in the flesh" so to speak, or the consistent defect that seems to hang with me through all step work thus far, is depression (clinical). I will relate how I deal with it as I take this step6. This condition at worse can be emotionally/physically and mentally paralyzing and at the other end of the spectrum, plain old uncomfortable with stinking thinking trying to get the upper hand to begin the spiral.
-These were the sequence of events as they played out a few days back. Now don't forget the drawback here-that the focus being Step6 this month lends itself to a nearness to our defects of character. Could this be my time, could this defect be going away this time to NOT RETURN. Stop there Scott! Where is your focus? OK prayer time, let's stop the downward spiral before it gets started! Prayer "What should I do?" Instant thought "Be" but with action!" Only action so far has been the praying. Now a call comes in, I have a chore. Great-purpose, something that requires action! Let's move, but gently with easy focus-only this chore. Bud (pet dog) tags along as he will need a walk before I can complete the chore and return. Oh a beautiful park just at the right time and I can do the rest of my spiritual work in God's garden. Scents, bird-song, new growth and water and so much wet green. I can experience the symphony of life here and now even in the midst of a down cycle. A glimpse of readiness, Scott may be ready for change. Same day a little later at an eastern type workout, I am confronted with my own anger (good anger) brought on when others tried to wrestle control of my emotions through coercion to commit and take part without allowing me time for due diligence. I stood firm and said "NO". Another gift, a glimpse of readiness-I was functional and decisive even in the midst of depression. Some more prayer as the day moves along-answer without being able to complete my prayer (even mentally) is "Share your Burden Scott, not something that may interest someone" another thought instantly"GO eat Scott!" and that is what I did.

So the point of all this-This is a spiritual program therefore I am praying my way through step 6 as I take it bit by bit. I have learned through this exercise of obedience (following what is obviously answers to prayer, as they often preceed the prayer to my God and Who else could pull that kind of thing off?) that I can function in depression although I do not like nor want to have to do so! Now as far as I am concerened I have done my part and will accept the result (depression goes or depression stays) as God's answer for me today!

The day in question above as I reflect was painful but very rewarding!! Program was in force and worked its magic!

The step whatever one it is at the time is used by God to mold me as planned (I believe this almighty God always knew every piece of the whole journey; how else could I believe that my God is ALL-powerful, ALmighty, ALL-knowing etc if anything could be unknown?). If I work it as best I can, the journey seems right and that is probably the "reasonably happy in this life" that the second part of the well-known serenity prayer talks about. This work demonstrates that for me the path is correct and the 12 steps are integral to my life

Ask For Readiness

Use a proven technique of TWO-WAY PRAYER to find out what you are ready to live without. Check out Wally P's rejuvenation of the original 75% success rate for addiction in Back To Basics http://www.aabacktobasics.org/Faith%20With%20Works%20Pub%20Co/contact.html Wally demonstrates the step by step program followed by many of the original pioneers of the 12 STEP program (AA) http://www.aa.org/



I like to to take each step apart for some of my work during each month. Step 6 says:
"Were entirely ready to have this Power (God) remove all these defects of character. " When am I ready to stand before God and ask for something? How humbling to believe that I will get help and that whatever is no longer in the best interest for my specific path in life, will be removed. Again FAITH to accept what results may come no matter what and be thankful as well. The power of prayer (2-way with a partner) lends itself so powerfully to this step. What will be revealed as we vulnerably approach and wait for answers? I find the partner system here works better than being alone in prayer as the listening person can focus entirely on receiving while the other does the praying and writing. It also teaches me spiritual trust which is so powerful and so high. Check out comments on two-way prayer page of www.SharingTheBurden.ca If I trust my God, I can do this openly and honestly!

What is a defect?

Sharing or Controlling?

Is my sharing simply an expression or am I trying to convince someone about my perception? As I prepared to work step6 (Were entirely ready to have this Power/God remove all these defects of character) this thought came to me. I find that as I read commentary and answer questions about any step, there are always new revelations about myself even though the step4 inventory has bean completed for a while. These usually require some immediate work, as does the above question. Now generally speaking I would say that I am simply sharing my thoughts on a topic, however, people speaking before me in any meeting undoubtedly put fuel or water on the fire I am building to share as a meeting progresses. It is at this point that I must be very careful not to slant my sharing toward disputing any part of someone else's thoughts. This could be very damaging to many in the room depending how I am seen by others in the particular group. If my sharing is trying in any way to teach, instruct change minds, make statements etc, then I believe it is wrongly motivated and I am working on others inventories, putting people down (even publicly) and feeding my ego. At this point my program is NOT working and I have fallen into the very pitfall that resulted in my coming to this 12 step philosophy for help in the first place-I am trying to CONTROL others and the reasons do not matter, it is wrong and very damaging. Where I have seen this type of thing in the past, I have seen very little Spiritual progress. I have no doubt that this co-dependent type behaviour detracts immensely from the spiritual healing available where people are self-focused in recovery. So beware of the powerful/articulate speaker who is motivated this way. I would say a simple statement like "I do not agree with such and such..." could easily send someone away to never return. Sharing is my expression of thought on a topic for all in a group to hear and cannot be directed AT SOMEONE.

So to whatever degree I do or have done this sort of thing, I now clearly see it and believe that I am therefore ready to have the defect removed. I will ask for that to happen in Step7 later! This awareness that happens as I work the steps has been such an healing ingredient for me in the past